If you ask my opinions, you're going to get it. You will get the honest opinion, no filter included. Do not ask me to tell you what you want to hear, because I will likely disappoint. I'm very blunt and I'm very honest, which becomes my greatest curse and greatest blessing all at once. I have a very minimal filter. However, this is when my opinion is solicited. With certain members of my family, I don't mind giving my unsolicited opinion (hey, it's what we do) but not with everyone. Of course I slip up and say things that are hurtful that could have been phrased in a better way. Most of the time, I do make an effort to present my difference of opinion in a respectful way. Until now. I have always believed and tried to treat rude people by "killing them with kindness." Recent events and conversations have sent me in a new direction. I'm turning off my very small filter.
It appears that the ones I make an effort to turn my filter on for would prefer to have my filter off. It appears that their filters are off with me. Maybe it is because I'm pregnant and people feel that they have a right to tell me how I look, how to raise my child, how to feed my child, where to let my child sleep, and other ridiculous things about parenting. People feel that it is acceptable to tell me that my life needs to be rearranged around their busy schedules. Yet when these rude comments are made, people are often shocked that I might not agree with them and stand up for myself. It may be a petty comment, but petty comments that come in abundance often lead me to a complete shut down with my filter. This often sends me to spouting off exactly what I think completely unsolicited.
Is this seriously a pregnancy thing or just a stupid people thing? Do people really believe that it is acceptable to say the first comment out of their mouth regardless of how rude it may be? Since when is it acceptable for anyone but my husband to discuss with me the pros and cons of breastfeeding or where Ethan should sleep? I completely appreciate the respectful discussions that I have had with several blog Mommies over the past few months. Conversations that are mature enough to allow me to appreciate another's opinion while mine is appreciated as well. These conversations are always a learning experience.
You don't have to agree with me all the time. If you disagree, do so respectfully. It isn't necessary to share with me everything you did to raise your own children and insist that my difference of opinion is cruel or appalling. It isn't necessary to disregard any maternal instincts I may have for my own son just because you are already a mother. It certainly isn't appropriate to insist that my pregnancy and life with my son revolves around anyone else. If this is the case when you share your opinion, Jason and I have it covered, thanks though.
Sigh. Sometimes I wish my face-to-face encounters were unaware that I have a blog.